As the mother of four very busy children, my life-year would start in August with new beginnings and a well rested summer of fun. As a stay-at-home-and-always-working Mom, I could plan on losing 10-15 pounds each fall as I kept up with activities, volunteer committments and the usual up keep of a large household. In the last two years that all changed.
On 9/11 in 2001 we were all devastated by the attack of the World Trade Center. I was working at a job I loved in the Career Center of my children’s high school in Boise, Idaho. We had lived in Boise over 17 years, our two youngest children were born there, we all grew up there enjoying the "good life". I could be a mother to not only my own children, but all their friends and over 2,000 other high school students. We were the Kool-aid house. Our friends were all around us. We would live out our days in beautiful Idaho.
We got through that day, the swim meet and band practice that evening to go home and watch television while letting the emotions wash over us. We were truly blessed. Two years later, to the day, I started a new job, in a new city with no close friends or family nearby. My husband, Dennis, had been released from a job of 20+ years in an industry where he was highly respected and loved. He quickly found a new job, we sold our beloved home, left great friends behind and started fresh with our youngest two children - twins who were juniors in high school - to Boulder, Colorado. Our oldest two were away in college.
Initially, a person just exists; get through the day feeling totally out of place. Smile; make new friends where you have no history. Nobody knows your name. We were the "new people" continually lost while trying to find Target. On 9/11 in 2003 I started working 40 hours a week for the first time since our first child was born. I stopped exercising, no time for self-reflection, less time for family activities. But, Boulder has a way of changing a person. Through my employment, I create bonds with some of the most incredible women that I have ever crossed paths with - Nicole Casanova and Kristen Werning.
Fast forward to another beginning, August 2004. My closest girlfriend is fighting cancer. Our youngest children are starting their senior year in high school. We are working hard to get them into the colleges of their dreams. Dennis and I will be "empty nesters". I have advanced in my job, but I am lacking the passion due to situations beyond my control. Dennis’ step-father succumbs to lung ailments in October, leaving his mother alone in another state. Our oldest son will be graduating from college with his Master’s Degree in a technology field - will he have a job? My father, the patriarch, is having serious health problems and is diagnosed as terminal in April. Our middle son is struggling and wants to transfer closer to home. I drive to Boise one more time to help him move home and I re-live the separation from Boise. We are working on our home in anticipation that relatives will come for our dual high school graduation celebration. We plan our vacation to our oldest son’s graduation in California and a side trip to Yosemite. With three to be in college, I worry about money. All our appliances seem to be breaking.
We drive to Kansas over Memorial Day to bury Dennis’ step-father’s ashes. I can see peace for the first time in months in a windswept cemetary on a Kansas prairie down five miles of dirt road from the nearest hamlet. I see peace again in the waves off the California coast, I see peace in Yosemite Valley and I see peace in my father’s dying eyes. I start to question my purpose, what drives me, my passions, where is my peace? I pulled out my books, The Four Agreements, The Purpose Driven Life and anything written by Marianne Williamson.
I needed to shift. As I cared for my father under the guidance of Hospice, I received very clear answers to questions I had been turning over in my mind. I am not a religious, church affiliated person, but I never felt closer to Spirit in my life. Prior to the last extended visit to my father before he passed, I gave two week notice at my job and asked The Universe where she needed me. Answers came quickly, including improving my personal time management and health, spend more time with family and friends, work with people who inspire me, be able to see purpose in my work, be passionate, enjoy what I do and, most of all, have faith. This was my dream. With the moral support of my family, who built my home office while I spent a week with my newly widowed mother, I have been given the gift to share my talents with Shift the Game. I started formally working with Nicole and Kristen in August. My life-year begins again. Somethings don’t change.
At some time in our lives, we all need to evaluate. Being a participant in the creation of Shift the Game, I have been able to determine where I would find my dreams and I have been given the opportunity to help others do the same. Dare to shift your life - you may be surprised by the outcome.
